Wednesday, January 9, 2008


I feel badly for fingers. So little comes from our fingers. It's all about the thumbs. Don't believe me? I'll explain.

You might have a green thumb, for example. That doesn't mean you have a medical condition. A green thumb is a good thing.

But you can't have too many thumbs because then you might become all thumbs. That is bad. A green thumb is good. All thumbs are bad. I don't know what happens if you're all green thumbs. Does that make you a really good, but clumsy gardener?

But then you can give someone thumbs up! Or down. Or if it's really good, two thumbs up! Someone did that once and decided to copyright their thumbs. Now only a few select people can truly give two thumbs up.

You can thumb your nose at someone, though I've never seen anyone do that. I suppose that's because if you do it at the heat of the moment, you might miss and pick your nose instead -- or poke an eye out.

You've got thumb tacks, but not finger tacks, though you use your fingers too. Thumbs can be at war with each other, and even your arms can get into it when you arm wrestle. But your fingers? Nothing. Zip.

Thumbs can hitch you a ride, but you can't point to where you're going unless you use your finger. How weird is that?

But pointing is rude, so you shouldn't do that. So is using your middle finger, though somehow that becomes "flipping the bird." Where are all these upside down birds? I have yet to see one. But that's another story for another day.

Lets do more with our fingers and give our thumbs a rest. Ladyfinger anyone?

No comments: