Tuesday, January 29, 2008

More thoughts on Doctors

Some thoughts about the doctor:

How a doctor treats you
Birth to Age 18
Me: "My throat hurts and my nose is running."
Doctor: "Ok, I'm going to run a throat culture, give you these anti-biotics and to be on the safe side, we'll x-ray your nose."

Age 19 to Age 35
Me: "My throat hurts and my nose is running."
Doctor: "...and I hurt my elbow playing tennis. Get over yourself. Suck on some ice and blow your damn nose."

Age 35+
Me: "My throat hurts and my nose is running."
Doctor: "Hmmmm, let me check your prostate..."

What do you say when you're giving the nurse your urine sample
"Here, this is for you. Have fun."
"How's that for ya!"
"Hey, is that yellow, or what!"
"Shit, a new speed record for me!"
"Watch the jar there as I got a little splash if you know what I mean..."

Good Luck!
Anyone else find it odd that when going to the hospital for an operation, you're wished "Good luck?"

Why are we wished luck before an operation? We're unconscious the entire time! "Hey Jeff, good luck on that operation. Hopefully you sleep the entire time. Good luck in that!"

I'm pretty sure good luck isn't covered by medical insurance: "Hi, does my coverage include extra luck? No? How about good luck? No? Just luck in general? Wow, so it might be good OR bad luck! How do I upgrade my coverage?"

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

LOL and eww to the urine sample. Thankfully I haven't had to do that very often. I haven't ever had an operation either.
I did at one time have pains in my abdomen though. It required an ultrasound, then I went for a 2nd one. At the end of it all... I was told "there's nothing we can do. It's just how your body works" Well wtf was the point of all those tests then.